The Week

People think writing is exciting, but it's not—unless you're the type of person who finds sitting on your ass all day a thrill. So, really, I hardly ever have an exciting week. Most weeks consist of a lot of typing punctuated with the occasional mild pleasure—like finding a dollar in the pocket of your jeans. 

However, this past week was truly action-packed and exhilarating. So exhilarating, I thought you guys would totally be entertained by all the festivities. But then I ran into a snag.

The snag: somehow all that excitement didn't translate into an interesting blog article.

Bummer, right? Fortunately for you, I have a few pictures from the week. Unfortunately for you, the pictures are still boring. Oh well. Deal with it.

Last week my friend Lou¹ asked me to be his +1 at the launch party for Bulleit Rye a) because his wife couldn't make it and 2) because I love whiskey. The first person I met was Tom Bulleit. He and I discussed San Francisco and the Presidio over a glass of his finest.

Next to Tom is his daughter Hollis, who chatted with me and Jorie (one of the bartenders at Zero Zero) about drag queens and real boobs.

There were all sorts of cocktail stations set up. This is the interactive bar:

I made a beeline there, thinking interactive meant I'd get to mix drinks or—I don't know—dance on the counter. None of that happened. But Dominic (the bearded dude on the right) did make me an awesome cocktail with rye and coffee liqueur. 

The thing about going to the launch party for rye is that almost everyone is drinking, ergo conversation is interesting. That afternoon, I discussed Presbyterians, cupcakes, Ron Jeremy's mustache, writing, and breaking into hotels to use their swimming pools. I'm chalking the event down to one awesome research trip.

Speaking about research... On Sunday, Macy's was offering a cupcake class.

I always need to do research on cupcakes, so of course I attended. I thought they'd lecture us about Spring trends for cupcakes and then give us some samples. I didn't realize it was a cupcake decorating class. My table was supposed to make this flower:

But when I got my allotted supplies, I realized I needed to make a monster instead. Meet Ralph:

He's a happy monster, not the kind that hides under your bed. He really needed blue fur instead of yellow, but I had to use what they gave me. (I wouldn't be surprised to find out that cupcake chefs moonlight as prison guards. They were hardcore.)

Really, I just wanted to eat cupcakes. My beloved told me I should have cut out the middleman and gone to a cupcake store instead. Very true. I could have hung out in a cupcake boutique all afternoon without having to work for my cake. 

In other news... Remember the whole "sitting on your ass all day" them I started this blog with? That's what I've been doing. I'm rewarded for my efforts because I'm on the home stretch with my book. Except last week I had a panic about what was supposed to happen on the way to the resolution, so I mapped it out. Behold the end of my book:

The end is nigh. And then: a celebratory rye.²

¹ Photos of the Bulleit Rye launch are courtesy of my friend Lou Bustamonte. He and I went to high school together. We were the cool kids, and we still are.

² Yes, I realize that a career in poetry is probably not in the cards for me.